The Secret of LIFESKILLS

The incredible experience of the Pennsylvania Youth Foundation's annual LifeSkills Conference continues to "WOW" the young, their parents and adult volunteers who participated in the program. What is the secret of its success?

Many have called it "the best week of my life" and "an experience that everyone, young and old, should have." For some it was a great week "at camp" with new friends and challenging experiences. For others, it was a life-changing experience.

One parent called after the conference to ask, "What did you do to my daughter? She is open, communicative, respectful, and actively participating in our family life...she wasn't doing that before...thank you and God bless you for giving us our daughter back!"

The LifeSkills experience is based upon a voluntary "Full Value Contract." Each participant agrees verbally to treat each other with respect, to take responsibility for what they say and do, and to build up relationships, rather than tear them down. Participants know that everyone will have difficulty with this at first and that their success is dependent upon keeping each other on track by sharing constructive feedback. The co-ed program includes many social interactions, ethical discussions, and problem-solving projects with applications to daily living.

Steven N. Pyser, P.M., St. John's Lodge No. 115, Philadelphia, who completed his second year of volunteer service on the staff, is an attorney who teaches in the Graduate Business and Management program at the University of Phoenix Philadelphia Campus on subjects that are incorporated in the LifeSkills curriculum. He is well versed in International Peacekeeping and Conflict Resolution and serves on the Editorial Board of the Conflict Resolution Quarterly. Seeing youth practicing skills that adults often cannot master was eye-opening for Bro. Pyser. He explained:

"I offered them a great deal of attention, uninterrupted speaking time, and unconditional acceptance. It may be the first time some of the kids experienced this approach. It is a very power-positive mixture...bonding and group development occurred in a very compressed time."

Another concept is "Challenge By Choice." Participants are encouraged to set their own goals and their own limits and choose how far they are willing to push themselves to grow as young adults. Experiencing the high ropes course was the most dramatic demonstration of the power of this challenge. Many of the boys and girls had to overcome their fears to climb trees, walk along thin wires, and jump from platforms as high as 80 feet. More importantly, they have to trust the safety equipment, their adult counselors, and their newfound friends who are holding onto their safety lines and belaying them from the ground.

Less dramatic, but more profound, they find even greater empowerment in being able to choose how far they challenge their willingness to trust others. With that empowerment comes a strong sense of responsibility as they are shown how every choice they make during the week affects all those around them. That is the "secret" of the Conference -- as they struggle for independence and complete power over the direction of their life, the most effective choices they make are those in which they seek counsel from parents, mentors, or their peers whom they can truly trust. The key to reaching adulthood successfully becomes apparent and they learn the invaluable lesson that "no one is an island."

The synergy of the program is exciting. Each of the staff members and the participants possess great talent and enthusiasm that, when brought together, make an exciting week. Details about the conference program, cost, and schedule are available from your Lodge Secretary or Lodge Youth Committee Chairman, or may be found on-line by clicking here.